I am posting this for curious Village Light Opera Group "Starship Pinafore" audience/cast who may be checking me out. Watch this and decide for yourself if you care that suicide is illegal.
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I am posting this for curious Village Light Opera Group "Starship Pinafore" audience/cast who may be checking me out. Watch this and decide for yourself if you care that suicide is illegal.
November 14, 2009 | Permalink | Comments (0)
If that's not enough for you I thoroughly endorse this rendition from the 2005 Southampton Operatic Society's production of Iolanthe using DANCERS. It is laugh-out-loud stupid! But it's got people moving around a lot, and audiences need that, don't they?
October 10, 2009 in Music | Permalink | Comments (0)
Right. So the 2009 - 2010 Isaac Asimov Award for Artistic Excellence etc. was presented on Sunday, October 4. Why the award couldn't be given at our annual New Year's Eve concert or one of the City Center performances in January and have it be the much simpler and catchier 2010 Isaac Asimov Award for Artistic Excellence etc., I just don't know. The award is presented as the highlight of one of those free special events for NYGASP contributors. They love these event/shows. They get to eat and drink Sunday afternoon-type stuff (but no Bloody Marys???) and actually interact with the STARS OF NYGASP, and, like most semi-celebrities, we love our fans. Al's favorite part of the program is that he gets to use a microphone. He just loves those things. It has become a tradition at these presentations (because every year Al suddenly announces, over the microphone, that we are going to do it) for each of the past Asimov winners to get up and tell a NYGASP anecdote! At least one or two of us always says how NYGASP is a family, we all really care about and learn from each other, etc. - all absolutely true of course and I am the last to deny it - but that ain't no anecdote.
The only trouble with NYGASP anecdotes is that all the best ones are ALL ABOUT AL. There just isn't anybody in the company who's as interesting as him. And the trouble with the stories being all about Al is that people outside the company don't really know him, and might be a little confused? Appalled? Or just not get it. So this year when Al introduced me and I pried the microphone from his iron grasp I decided to tell a fictitious Al anecdote which nevertheless could seem kind of trueish:
"I'd like to tell you the story of the drunkest I've ever seen Al."
[At this point Al crossed his arms and legs and sat back in his seat. He's not that much of a drinker and it's impossible to guess what he thought was coming...]
"We were on tour and were in a crappy bar attached to a crappy motel somewhere down south. We had done a 7:00 Pinafore so it was an early evening and the entire cast was there. Louis talked Al into doing shots with him. Al got staggeringly drunk on Crystal Light and vodka. Quickly became loud and belligerent. Started harassing rednecks - "Hey, we're an opera company! Yankees! From up north! Want to make something of it?" The bartender asked Al to quiet down and stop bullying the murderous types, but Al responded by making us all stand up and sing "Hail Poetry." The bartender closed the bar and threw everyone out. The rednecks were pissed. Al was scared and wouldn't go back to his room. We blamed the whole affair on 2005 - 2006 Isaac Asimov Award for Artistic Excellence etc. winner Louis Dall'Ava, so Al spent the night snoring in Louis' room. When he left at dawn he found that his Ryder truck had been washed by a secret admirer."
The 2009 - 2010 Isaac Asimov Award Winner for Artistic Excellence etc. is . . .
I work with Angie all the time, as she is Buttercup, Ruth, and Katisha, sings with the Quintet, and was my Duchess in "Gondoliers". She is a magnificent colleague and everyone was delighted to see her get her name on the plaque.October 10, 2009 in "Cult celebrities", Music | Permalink | Comments (3)
October 01, 2009 | Permalink | Comments (3)
Last week was indeed extraordinarily difficult for all of us, with not only the death of Ed McMahon but the total absence of stunned mourners "HEY-O"ing in the streets, any increase in sales of Ed McMahon memorabilia, or even any speculation about who will be America's next guffawing stooge. Budweiser and Alpo, two products which McMahon was proud to represent, have issued no comment of which I am aware. Johnny Carson has said nothing, nor is he likely to.
I therefore urge you at this time to Google Ed McMahon, HE WHO HAWED, read everything you can about him, and consider whether you could possibly waste even more time this week paying attention to the deaths of seriously pathetic celebrities you really won't miss.
June 28, 2009 | Permalink | Comments (1)
June 12, 2009 | Permalink | Comments (0)
THE BIG GAY ICE CREAM TRUCK, Douglas Quint and Bryan Petroff, proprietoresses, comes out at noon this Saturday, June 13! At BROOKLYN PRIDE, Brooklyn's comparatively sedate gay thing, located in Prospect Park at Bartel-Pritchard Circle, 15th Street and Prospect Park West. Doug (my tiny little brother) still, as of this writing, has not received his overdue food vendor's license from the incredibly lardass, waddling behemoth Department of Consumer Affairs. Doug's ice cream vendor guru will be there to actually pull the soft serve handle in case someone demands to see a certificate. Among the toppings to be offered: TRIX cereal ("Trix ARE for kids, but adults can have 'em too. It's queer, colorful, and youngster-friendly, like us!"); Cayenne pepper ("It makes the chocolate into something really surreal."); Fresh berries du jour; and maple syrup.
There will also be a GAY PARADE that night at 7:30! So much gaiety stuffed tightly into one day! Can you bear it? The truck might be in the parade, but come to the park in the afternoon, before 4. It's supposed to be the first decent weather we've had in a week.
All sizes and styles! Choice of BIG GAY ICE CREAM TRUCK logos!
June 11, 2009 in Food and Drink, Not one G&S reference | Permalink | Comments (0)
Here's the latest on my brother Doug's BIG GAY ICE CREAM TRUCK at NBC New York dot com! Hopefully hitting the streets next week (June 8)!!!
June 06, 2009 | Permalink | Comments (0)
I have taken part in the first of my Three Known Nerd Events of the Summer: I saw and loved Star Trek. For extra Nerd Karma bonus points I saw it the day before it opened officially, with a crowd of approving Believers. I always like to see a movie I know I want to see as soon as I can see it, see? Before the reviews come out. I like to read reviews but they always spoil too much. Suffice it to say that nothing about the movie failed to satisfy. Kirk fights, humps an alien (female), and hangs from three different cliffs. Spock says "Fascinating" and talks to himself. All the old "Star Trek" TV sound effects are heard again. There are thrills, laughs, and mind-numbing plot twists. WARNING: time travel and parallel universes are involved, so set your logic on "stun." I saw it a second time with the family. Maggie loves Kirk (Chris Pine)! She was surprised to learn that WILLIAM SHATNER played him on TV!
This weekend: my final G&S performances of the summer (and second Nerd Event): NYGASP's The Pirates of Penzance at The Filene Center, Wolf Trap Foundation for the Arts, Vienna, VA. Our FIFTEENTH consecutive appearance at this Tanglewood-type outdoor amphitheater. May 29 & 30 at 8. "Pirates" is my favorite of the NYGASP stagings - no topical gags (except "Department of Homeland Security"), only three quick encores, the chorus is encouraged to act and is therefore extremely funny, the choreography looks somewhat professional and fun, limited buttinski stuff from the pit. The infallible Michele McConnell is a great Mabel, Colm Fitzmaurice is a rugged-looking, completely charming Frederick, and David Macaluso as Samuel, the speaking pirate who isn't the Pirate King, usually hits his interpolated high G#. I am still enjoying playing the Major-General, which is still not yet an age-appropriate role for me. The principals wear body mics - a lovely thing. Only a real sourpuss wouldn't enjoy our Pirates of Penzance.
Event of the Nerd the Third: June 3 & 4 I will be attending two days of the annual International Horn Symposium in Macomb (near Chicago), IL. Every year, in a different international location, several hundred hornplayers from EVERYWHERE get together for a week of concerts, lectures, exhibits and geeky socializing! I have done full weeks of this thing in the distant past but will only be attending Wednesday and Thursday because two days are cheaper. People who don't know me, and/or have never clicked on "ABOUT ," in the upper left of this page, may not know that I spent several years of my professional life, such as it is, as a hornplayer in and around New York and on tour in various ensembles. This part of my life got phased out due to imposed physical limitations and my simultaneous success as a thespian. But I have found - I am surprised it took me this long - that I can still play extremely well on a lighter instrument. There are all types of configurations of French horns, using more or less tubing, though the standard full double F/Bb horn is OVERWHELMINGLY the most popular on this continent. I am switching to a single Bb horn. Single Bb.
As you can see, the double horn has lots more metal, and certain advantages for which I think I can compensate. A couple of weeks ago I played my first horn solo in about TEN YEARS, at a NYGASP function. "Over the Rainbow," on Al Bergeret's old double horn. It went very well - like one nicked note, and I was not overcome with nerves, as used to be the norm. Professional-quality single horns are rare in America, but the Symposium is an international event, and manufacturers will have them on exhibit and ready to be sampled and possibly bought.
The NYGASP thing for which I played was the annual Asimov Awardee concert, this year presented by winner Michael Galante. Next Spring I have to give you warning about this concert. NYGASP singers who aren't often heard in solo roles with the company - like CHRIS-IAN SANCHEZ - get to present themselves, and "stalwarts" like me get to do something different. The concert is free and a regular riot!
Also, my brother Doug will, at a time yet to be announced, come out with THE BIG GAY ICE CREAM TRUCK! Click on it! And stand by circa this site!
May 26, 2009 in Film, Food and Drink, Music | Permalink | Comments (2)
Here is a major dose of bizarre insanity WITH A MESSAGE to keep you on your toes, courtesy of the magnificent BRAD WILSON.
The NEW YORK GILBERT AND SULLIVAN PLAYERS' next eagerly, obsessively, rabidly awaited performance is The Pirates of Penzance (YAY!) Friday and Saturday, May 1 & 2, at 8, in Cerritos, California, just south of Los Angeles, at the Cerritos Center for the Performing Arts. The company's first performance on the West Coast. Giant theater,
basically sold out but try your luck. Yes, yes, I am the Major-General. It is, it is
a glorious thing to be one. Have you ever known what it is to be one? NYGASP will now have performed coast to coast, but WHAT ABOUT MAINE??? WHAT ARE YOU GUYS WAITING FOR? I'll personally guarantee an EXCLUSIVE - I mean excruciating - INTERVIEW with AL BERGERET to ANYONE FROM MAINE WHO WANTS ONE.
April 10, 2009 | Permalink | Comments (0)
Tomorrow night, Friday April 3, NYGASP will be doing "Mikado" at the Community Theatre at Mayo Center for Performing Arts, Morristown, NJ. This will be my last NYGASP Ko-Ko for, well, indefinitely. I am listening for your involuntary "Thank God!"
In other urgent news, last night I went to the New York debut of Edinburgh's REALLY TERRIBLE ORCHESTRA. It was pretty good. I went with PETER HIRSCH. As we
were walking up 43rd to Town Hall we heard BAGPIPES, which
never ever sound any good however well they're played. I guess these
were played OK but it still sounded like the worst possible
oboe-playing combined with screaming cats. It was from kilted guys standing outside Town Hall. Because the RTO is
from Edinburgh.
PETER HIRSCH as Hoppy the French Horn Frog in the "Teach Your Retarded Child What A Brass Instrument Is!" video (VHS only).
It was a good-sized audience, with some empty sections. Quite a few people followed them over from Scotland. The orchestra
was 45 - 50 white people, all dressed nicely and sometimes a bit
eccentrically, but not at all uniformly. The principal cellist was a
bald woman. The flutes were a beaky-faced middle-aged
woman, a girl with fabulous knockers, and
an old bald coot with wild bushy eyebrows. An ancient crone was one
of the percussionists. There were two euphoniums, one played by a woman
who was either blind, deaf, or probably dyslexic. She had a girl
sitting beside her the entire time conducting her, counting out loud,
and pointing at her music. Everyone in the orchestra was a character.
They very obviously enjoyed themselves all the way through. It's the thing I love most about community theater productions. Their
performance stinks but you never get tired of watching the individuals.
The music they chose was frequently kind of a drag. They did stuff that
was SUPPOSED to be funny. They had a real
Scottish Major-General sing a not particularly ingenious rewritten Major-General
song, there was a pointless Sound of Music singalong, a Scottish thing with
solo bagpipes, some original
pieces composed for the RTO - a brief African-ish tone poem and an arrangement of "Over the Rainbow" for
musical saw. Along the more entertaining lines for which I had hoped they
also gave a miserable performance of "Pizzicato Polka" in which no one
could get their attacks together, a couple of noisy marches, and the last 4 minutes of 1812
Overture, because the first 10 are much too difficult. We were given
paper bags to inflate and explode for the canon cues.
There was also a lot of talk,
mostly pretty amusing, from the conductor and the famous and prolific author Alexander McCall Smith (The No. 1 Ladies Detective Agency, 44 Scotland Street, Isabel Dalhousie), who is a founding member and first euphoniumist (I've got him on the list).
You should have seen the orchestra's faces when we gave them a standing
ovation! They were thrilled to death.
April 02, 2009 in "Cult celebrities", Music | Permalink | Comments (3)
Just trying to perk things up around here with this particularly enticing photo of Shemp. Click on the "WALL OF SHEMP" webpage and see actual items OWNED BY SHEMP!!!
January 19, 2009 in "Cult celebrities", Film, Not one G&S reference | Permalink | Comments (0)
Here are links for online reviews FOR YOU TA HAVE, SEE?
http://www.nytheatre.com/nytheatre/showpage.php?t=ive7819
http://talkentertainment.com/c-8214-Gilbert-Sullivan-with-a-twist-at-the-Triad.aspx
Get a load of this review from "Backstage," a national showbiz newspaper. Is this a positive or a big thumbs down? What a mess! By David Finkle. How much would you pay a critic who doesn't tell you clearly whether he thought the show was any good?
http://www.backstage.com/bso/news_reviews/nyc/article_display.jsp?vnu_content_id=1003929195
January 12, 2009 | Permalink | Comments (1)
The NYGASP cabaret act "I've Got A Little Twist" had its first performance last night and we killed! Slaughtered! Mutilated! Ate the corpses of the newly-deceased and instantly acquired all their heroic attributes! We were great! And NERVOUS? - oy, all six of us agreed we hadn't had such nerves in years! Still, it wasn't a totally disagreeable feeling, and it made us perform EVEN BETTER.
The audience entered the intimate theater in a grumbly mood - problems with the seating kept some people standing out in the cold more than ten minutes, delaying the curtain by more than fifteen, but that is presumably an opening night thing. One guy who did unfortunately make it to his seat was the old fellow dead center right in front of the stage who got up and started laboriously putting on his coat as soon as we had closed our mouths in the final number, and who seemed oblivious that we were trying to accept our applause around him. I assume the two drink minimum was just too much for him. But the rest of the audience LOVE, LOVE, LOVED IT and was very generous with the laffs and claps. My kids (10 and 13) enjoyed the entire thing!
Remaining performances will be of even more superior quality and will take place Sundays, January 11 and 18, at 5, and Thursday, the 15th, at 7. Here's where to get further info at the NYGASP website. $30 - $40. Cash only. Cash for the hard goods, cash for the soft goods.
If you're here for further info about me, as promised in the program, click on "ABOUT," on your left under my 'Lecter' photo.
January 09, 2009 | Permalink | Comments (3)
I've never tried this before! I hereby offer you the option of clicking below and hearing me sing the Major-General song. I am not saying you should do this, but if you wanted to plug headphones into the computer, and make sure no one is spying on you, you could probably do it without too much shame.
Download 17 The Pirates Of Penzance - I Am The Very Model Of A Modern Major-General
My mother says it isn't loud enough, but I don't think there's anything I can do about it. Can you hear it?
January 05, 2009 | Permalink | Comments (0)
January 05, 2009 | Permalink | Comments (0)
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January 05, 2009 | Permalink | Comments (2)
Contact:
R.
M. Schlemielle, Director of The Art Museum Toilet Museum of
Art
www.artmuseumtoilet.org
Email: info@artmuseumtoilet.org
THE ART MUSEUM TOILET MUSEUM OF ART - NOW ACCEPTING IMAGES
World-renowned Collection’s First-Ever Call For Submissions
New York, NY, — The Art Museum Toilet Museum of Art, the world’s largest collection of images of art museum toilets taken at various art museums around the world, is seeking to add to its unique collection through a call for submissions from other art museum art toilet aficionados.
The site currently houses exclusive images ranging from the prestigious marble lavatory at the Metropolitan Museum of New York, behind-closed-doors shots of the Hermitage’s latrines and the decaying (yet still flushing) pictures of the MongolianArt Museum’s commodes.
“Our collection is one-of-a-kind, yet we realize that in today’s globalized world that it is important to expand our collection of images,” stated R. M. Schlemielle, Director of The Art Museum Toilet Museum of Art. “We are seeking to have an image from every museum on the globe represented in our collection.”
The Art Museum Toilet Museum of Art was officially founded in 2005 and since its inception, staff members have tirelessly been collecting images from around the world. Believed by experts to be the world’s largest, it was built to showcase the forgotten art that can be found in every museum.
By opening its doors and asking the public to add to its collection, the museum is entering an exciting new chapter for both the museum and the art world.
The official submission process includes sending an image to: submissions@artmuseumtoilet.org. Museum officials ask that each image be labeled with the name of the museum, the day the photo was taken and the name of the photographer. All will be posted if the image is selected.
"The Art Museum Toilet Museum of Art was founded in the spirit of Marcel Duchamp, who in 1917 produced the sculpture “Fountain” and changed the way we view art," Schlemielle said. "This piece essentially showcased that art may not be hanging in the proud walls of a museum gallery, but in the common objects of everyday life -- even in the restroom. This website is asking some of the same questions about the current art establishment and questions what defines high brow art."
For more information about The Art Museum Toilet Museum of Art please contact: info@artmuseumtoilet.org.
*Please note all images sent to the museum become property of the museum and can be printed & distributed at will and become property of The ArtMuseumToiletMuseum of Art.
* * *
The Art Museum Toilet Museum of Art is a collection that features digital works. All images, text, concepts sent to the museum become property of the museum and can be copied, distributed and utilized for marketing collateral at will.
The Museum also sells a catalog, select clothing, postcards, posters, prints and CDs.
# # #
December 10, 2008 in (Guest) Rant , body functions, Current Affairs, Insane Violence, Not one G&S reference, Perverts, Science | Permalink | Comments (0)
December 01, 2008 in (Guest) Rant | Permalink | Comments (0)
Steve reports that the NYGASP performances in (where? Somewhere that isn't here, that's all that really matters) are definitely happening. He didn't really say if they were good or bad but if you've got both Alan Hill and Paul Sigrist in the show, at least the men's chorus is entertaining.
The mother of Steve (and myself) has been in the hospital for something like 12 days now. GACK! If you know her and want to send her a card, email me for her new address. dougquint @ yahoo.com
In my own exciting news, some of you loons might know Katie Geissinger, whose name seems to get an incredible 19,100 hits on Google. Most of those hits are probably for her Japanese school-girl porn, but still, it must be nice! Anyhow, tomorrow night I have the pleasure of playing in the orchestra for Honegger's KING DAVID and Ms. G knocked my tits off at rehearsal last night. Here's a link in case you're inclined to come sniff her. I mean hear her.
http://www.dessoff.org/new/
And lastly:
Love,
DOUG
November 19, 2008 in (Guest) Rant | Permalink | Comments (0)
Stop the presses! Here's news worthy of interrupting my unprecedented streak of non-blogging! The New York Gilbert and Sullivan Players, giving vitality to the living legacy of Gilbert of Sullivan, aren't dead yet! And we're a-goin' on a SOUTHERN TOUR this Thursday, November 13, 2008, through Wednesday, the 19th. It's an all - (NYGASP) star cast featuring everyone you'd expect including me, in a red jacket so you can't miss me, and including ALAN HILL, an actual Southern boy.
Here, torn bleeding from the NYGASP website, is our schedule:
The Wand'ring Minstrels perform their cabaret version of The Pirates of Penzance, with a second act of mixed selections from the Gilbert & Sullivan canon. Visit Troy Arts Council for more information.
2 performances! Newberry Opera House
I hope that some of my Newberry friends will make themselves known.
The "Wand'ring Minstrels" is me and four other people, with piano. In the second half we take audience requests! Exclusively G&S, of course, but if some wise guy wants to ask for "People Will Say We're In Love" it wouldn't be the first time, and we'd have our private little joke. All the rest of the performances are the full company, with a hired local pick-up orchestra of non-802 AF of M members.
In other NYGASP news, MICHAEL GALANTE was the winner of this year's Isaac Asimov Award for being with the company a while and excellence and stuff like that.
Also, if you follow the company's misadventures at all you probably know that we are not doing our customary January season at City Center, for reasons mostly involving potential financial disaster.
November 10, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (1)
THE ELLINGTON ROOM PRESENTS
A READING OF BALDERSTON & DEANE'S 1927:
DRACULA
Admission is free ! The cast
includes members & friends of NYGASP ... including Stephen Quint,
Angie Smith, Daniel
Lockwood, Keith Jurosko (as Van Helsing) ...Andrew Taines & Omar Prince (as Count Dracula).
ATTEND ON BELA LUGOSI’S 126TH BIRTHDAY!
Monday, October 20th at 7pm
400 WEST 43RD STREET, 2ND FLOOR
NEW YORK, NEW YORK
CORNER OF 9TH AVENUE
Please do come
& join us for some pre-Halloween fun & this grand old play...that
made Bela Lugosi
THE Dracula of his time & was the basis for the 1931 film of "Dracula."
October 19, 2008 | Permalink | Comments (0)